Change is hard. I recently read that the average person makes the same New Year’s resolution ten different times without success. Have you been there? I know I have.
We all want to see change in our lives and change in our families, yet it seems to elude us.
This is the time of year when I hope you are dreaming and thinking about what changes you want to see happen in 2016.
I was recently watching a great video series by professional coach, mentor and inspirer, Michael Hyatt at best year ever. After the videos I grabbed my wife Araya’s hand and asked her to come sit with me on the couch. I looked her in the eyes and said,
“Araya, when we hit this time in 2016, what do you want to say we did?”
She thought about it and said, “I want romantic dates.”
We kept holding hands and I said, “I want to buy a house.”
She volleyed back with, “I want to go on a road trip to the Smokey Mountains.”
Then I said, “I want to write a book.”
Apparently one-on-one time at Chick Fil-A while our four kids take over the play area isn’t “romantic” enough.
We went back and forth for the next several minutes and I typed them all out. By the time we were done there were sixteen items on our 2016 better together list.
Now anyone who knows me knows that God gave me a spontaneity gene that is prone to this kind of dreaming, but change is hard.
Change is especially hard if Araya and I are not on the same page together. Let me say that again, change is especially hard if Araya and I are not on the same page together.
There is an inscription of Psalm 34:3 on the inside of my wedding ring. It is the same verse I spoke to Araya the day I got down on one knee and asked her to spend the rest of her life with me. It says,
“Come glorify the Lord with me, let us exalt His name together.”
In our fourteen years of marriage we have accomplished some amazing goals. We paid off all our debt, we moved across the country, and we went on mission trips to Africa and the Middle East.
We have also failed at a bunch of goals. We haven’t lost the weight we wanted, we haven’t simplified our life like we hoped, and we haven’t saved as much money as we desired.
What we’ve learned is that we are better together.
In December 2016 Araya and I are going to be sitting on the couch, and telling stories about what we did during the year. Change is hard, and we simply can’t tell the stories we want to tell, have the fun we want to have, or achieve the goals we set if we aren’t together in them.
What about you? Are you truly together? Have you taken the time to hold hands and listen to each others dreams? Click here for questions to get you started.
- Consider being spontaneous or setting an appointment to hold hands and listen to each others 2016 dreams this week. Write them down.
- Revisit your past goals accomplished or dreams realized and look for the common denominators of success. Name them and take aim at 2016.